16 jun. 2010

Good idea! "I alone will behold the dying sky"

So imminently visible - this cloaked innocent guilt Sentenced to a lifetime, a second of structured chaos Trampled by the ferocious, raging crowds of solitude I'm the soil beneath me soaking up the sustenance of my own death Extradited to the gods of chance, the deities of all things random Alive, multicolored, twitching in their dead monochrome world My heart and I have decided to end it all. Soon there'll be candles and prayers that are sad, I know. Death is no dream, for in death I'm caressing you. With the last breath of my soul I'll be blessing you. Gloomy Sunday. November 7,1999 Dear diary, today was my first day of school in Michigan. When I walked in the classroom some of the guys spit wads at me and called me a freak. That's the start of a bad day. Then some really popular pretty girls walked over to me and introduces theirselves. They told me that I was the ugliest thing they'd ever seen, and i started to cry. I went home and Jake called me. I thought the day would get better. But he told me that long distance relationships dont work out. He lived in California, and I moved to Michigan. Then I told him I loved him and that I missed him. He told me that the only reason he ever went out with me was because I was a joke, and he was dared to. Then he dumped me. We were going out for two and a half years! November 9,1999 Today got a little better. I miss jake so much you dont even know diary!!!! But he even changed his number so I wouldn't call him. But the most hottest guy at school asked me to the dance! And those prissy girls that said im ugly let me hang out with them at lunch today. It was cool!! November 10,1999 I'm crying right now... turns out that hot guy was a jerk at the dance he poured his punch on me, and those girls ripped my dress and everyone started laughing. Then my grandma told me today that mom and dad got in a little car accident today at work. They're in critical condition, they might die. I can't write anymore. November 11, 1999 Todays a saturday... but me and grandma were at the hospital all night long. Dad died this morning. Mom is going to live, but she's crippled for her life. I wanna die too. while we were at the hospital grandma found out that she had cancer in her stomach. She has to go on chemo-therapy. I cant believe daddy died. I'm crying more then I have my whole life. I'm in shock. I cant write...I'm too tired. I need sleep. November 12 Daddy is not dead! He can't be! Its all a dream. My life is perfect. Jake still loves me. I can barely write. I'm crying too much. I wanna die. Take me. Bye... Iridescent to the searhing eyes, I'm all things vivid in a world of grey So easily spotted, so easily claimed in this domain where all is prey My thoughts a radiant beacon to the omnidirectional hunter-god radar I'm a markerlight of flesh to these subconscious carnivores I am them. I am teeth. I'm their arousal at the kill Feasting on self. A schizoreality warp. The contradiction fulfilled Focus the only means to see me back to life's unending swirl A reversal of passing away, as the world of dead, as away is now my origin. Bipolar I Disorder is one of the most severe forms of mental illness and is characterized by recurrent episodes of mania and (more often) depression. The condition has a high rate of recurrence and if untreated, it has an approximately 15% risk of death by suicide. It is the third leading cause of death among people aged 15-24 years, and is the 6th leading cause of disability (lost years of healthy life) for people aged 15-44 years in the developed world. In adults, mania is usually episodic with an elevation of mood and increased energy and activity. In children, mania is commonly chronic rather than episodic, and usually presents in mixed states with irritability, anxiety and depression. In adults and children, during depression there is lowering of mood and decreased energy and activity. During a mixed episode both mania and depression can occur on the same day. Bipolar I Disorder is often associated with: alcoholism, drug addiction, Anorexia Nervosa, Bulimia Nervosa, Attention-Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, Panic Disorder, and Social Phobia. Hand healing is an alternative way to relieve pain and ailments without medicinal drugs or medical treatment. A hand healer is the person who provides this help, simply by laying their hands on the patient's body. Some hand healers believe that their abilities are divine gifts; which they practice publicly in front of large congregations, others have set up small businesses to treat those whom conventional medicines have been unable to treat, and some prefer to practice their abilities in ambiguity, on a closed circle of anonymous patients, without any form of payment other than the continued health of their patients. Unfortunately, hand healing isn't widely believed to produce the desired effects, and is said by scientists to only be effective psychologically, akin to a placebo pill given to an ailing person. It has however, been acclaimed by those treated as an effective way to regain one's health. TRAISKIRCHEN, Austria - Police say a mentally ill man was found living in a house with his deceased wife's corpse in the bathtub. Michael Hutchence - rock musician (Inxs) 1997 --- hanged himself with a belt in his room in the Ritz-Carlton Hotel, in Sydney, Australia. (Perhaps auto-erotic asphyxiation.) {There is a much-circulated, but undocumented story that she had dressed in her best outfit for the suicide and took her pills, washing them down with alcohol. Getting sick to her stomach, she rushed to the bathroom, but tripped and fell; drowning in the toilet.} shot himself; he died two days later. A baby found strangled near Third Street in San Franscisco.Since 1980, criteria for diagnosing bipolar disorder in adults have also been used to diagnose mania in children, with some modifications to adjust for age. Similarly, to diagnose a child or adolescent with bipolar disorder, there need be at least one period of mania that is manifested by a distinct period of abnormally and persistently elevated, expansive or irritable mood, lasting at least one week or any duration if hospitalization is required. Bupropion (available in the USA only) If used alone, antidepressants can sometimes cause "switching" into mania. Typically a mood stabilizer is prescribed in addition to the antidepressant to prevent this "overshoot" into mania. Antidepressants can take several weeks to take effect. Dementia is caused by the damage of brain cells. A head injury, stroke, brain tumor or disease (such as Alzheimer's disease) can damage brain cells. Us and them. Us. Bye.

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